Bel Amour Officiant Services

View Original

Do It Yourself Vows

Writing your own vows can be a daunting task but it doesn’t have to be! Bel Amour has a writing process that takes the guesswork out of writing your vows. Our four step process will have you listing things you love about your partner, details from your relationship, and what you want from your marriage. Once you have finished, choose your top few and start writing.

Step One: Your Partner

Think about your partner and what you love about them. Do they have a quirk that always puts a smile on your face? Are they unfailingly kind? Your list may look something like this.

Beautiful, kind, handsome, funny, smart, brilliant, giving, trustworthy, patient, generous, etc.

Step Two: Your Relationship

Think about your relationship and write down all the things you have in common, the things you like to do together, the way you met, and an inside joke or two. Your list may look like this:

Play games, Travel to all 50 states, go hiking in the Colorado mountains, date nights, went to same college, etc.

Step Three: The Marriage

The next step is to write down all the major themes you want in your marriage like trusting one another, being faithful, etc. Your list may look something like this:

Unconditional love, be best friends, listen to each other, prioritize the marriage, be kind even when upset, communicate, support each other through rough times, respect each other, be patient, be faithful to each other, always be truthful, etc.

Step Four: Put it all together

Look at your three lists and narrow it down to the top two or three from each. You can start with “I promise…” or “I vow…”. Some like to start with a sentence about becoming a husband or wife.


Here is an example using the formula.

“Michael, as soon as I saw you walking across the KU campus, I knew. You are the most brilliant, handsome, and kindest person I know, and I am so happy to become your wife today.

I promise to make time for date night, to put my phone away when we are spending time together, and let you win at Mario Kart, sometimes. I love you today and always.

I vow to be faithful, to be your best friend and support you in everything you do, to include you in all decisions that affect our marriage, to listen carefully when we disagree, and to be kind even when I’m upset.”


Still having trouble? Bel Amour is happy to help our couples write custom vows. We even have a worksheet!

Schedule your free phone consultation today!